I got pulled over for drunk driving.

[Morty]

There are many rules to follow when operating an automobile. The one rule that we all know is DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE.

There are many rules to follow on the jobsite and in construction in general. DON'T DRINK, DON'T BE INTOXICATED, DON'T DO DRUGS, and many other rules about making sure you are 100% clear in the head so you can work safely.

I want to remind all of you not to drink and drive. Its very serious.

Now let me tell you about how I got pulled over for the 1st time this morning for drunk driving.............

Wake up at 3AM.
Get dressed, grab my drink and head out the door.
Stop by the ATM machine while driving my way to the freeway.
Get some cash.
Hop back in and continue driving to towards the freeway on ramp.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

I notice there is a cop a ways behind me but no big deal. I drive fine, no worries. Turn on the blinker, check if its clear, which it most likely is since its about 3:20 in the fucking morning on god damn Saturday. All clear so I change lanes to the right.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Cop is still behind me a bit.

Hit the freeway on-ramp and being that its a steep hill to get onto the freeway, I accelerate a bit to make sure I am somewhat close to the speed I should be to be "going with the flow of traffic." Even though there is no fucking flow of traffic because its about 3:20 in the fucking morning on a god damn Saturday.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Cruising down the freeway, making sure I maintain a legal speed since the cop is still behind me about a 1/4 mile. Nothing odd, my neighborhood is at the far edge of his jurisdiction so he was most likely driving back towards the station or something. But I'm still driving at the legal speed even though its just me on the freeway with a cop about a 1/4 mile behind me.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Cruising down the freeway, don't like the way my steering wheel is positioned so I hit the release and adjust it just a little bit and keep on going down the freeway.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Getting about a 1/2 mile from an offramp and the cop is speeding up and gets right on my ass. BLOOP BLOOP. Lights flashing and totally confused what I did, I carefully pull over.

Over the loud speaker he tells me to exit the freeway, so I accelarate a bit and then get off the freeway. Drive down the street a bit to a safe looking spot to pull over and I do.

Put it in park. (Remembered to put it in park this time so I don't ram a gate ) Cop walks up on my left and pauses and I see he's got his flashlight pointing at me along with his gun. So to make him calm down a little I slowly place my hands out in front of the steering wheel so he can see both of them. Wait for him to tell me to roll the window down and then I do with one hand.

And this entire time I'm trying to figure out what I did and kinda nervous since I'm driving a company vehicle. Last thing I need is a moving violation on my record.

First question he asks me........

Cop: "How much you been drinking tonight?"
Me: "I don't drink."
Cop: "Seriously, how much have you been drinking tonight?"
Me: "I don't drink. I don't like the taste of alcohol."
Cop: "You coming back from a party?"
Me: "No, I'm on my way to work."
Cop: "You drinking a bit tonight?"
Me: "No, I just woke up 45 minutes ago and now I'm going to work>"
Cop: "At this time on a Saturday? You have a few drinks before heading to work?"
Me: "I haven't been drinking, I just woke up, I'm suppose to be at work before 4AM to unlock the gates to the jobsite because we are pouring concrete in a few hours and we still have some work to do."
Cop: "Where do you work that you had to leave so early from your party?"
Me: "I just left my house. I woke up not too long ago and now I'm headed to work down in Gardena. I'm in construction, we always start early."
Cop: "Let me have your license, registration and insurance."

I handed it to him and sit there for about 5 minutes while him and some other cop that pulled up talk and check me out on the computer.

Cop walks back up to my window: "You on probation?"
Me (laughing a little): "Nope. Never been in trouble with the law. Closest I've been to a police station was when they had a Haunted House for Halloween."
Cop: "You know how far before you change lanes you're suppose to turn on your turning signal?"
Me: "100 feet"
Cop: "Back there in La Crescenta, any idea how many feet you did it?"
Me: "75 feet maybe?"
Cop: "You're suppose to do 100 feet"
Me: "Sorry, I'll try and pay more attention."
Cop: "You were swirving a bit on the freeway, you sure you weren't drinking?"
Me: "Positive, I don't drink."
Cop: "Then why did you swirve?"
Me: "I adjusted my steering wheel a bit but I know I never even hit the bumps let alone get out of my lane if I happened to swirve while doing it."
Cop: "You appeared to be drinking."
Me: "I was drinking a little bit while going down the freeway, might of moved a little to the left or the right while I did that."
Cop (Looking at me with a big grin like he just busted me): "So you HAVE been drinking tonight haven't you?"
Me: "Only thing I've had a drink of since I left my house is this yogurt drink. (I hold it up and show him) I drink one every morning on my way to work."
Cop (no smile, but now has a bit of a pissed glare): "You need to drive more carefully and operate your blinkers properly."
Me: "Sorry about that. Will do."

He hands me back my paperwork and both cops drive off. I have never experienced anything like that before. Couldn't believe it. And all I could think of is that I'm in my company vehicle and that I'm suppose to be unlocking the gates for my concrete guy. So I continue down the street and get back on the freeway a few blocks away. Get to work a few minutes late but my concrete guy was a few minutes late too since he ran through Jack in the Box for food.

So that was my morning.

But here at work, everything is going really well today. Got concrete across one of the major walkways of the school which is good and my HVAC guys are here knocking some stuff out too.

Should get out of here about 2:30PM and get home, shower and take a bit of a nap.

I gotta go walk the site so spank it easy!

[CableMonkey]

Morty, you are a Pathetic Drunk

[BunnyMan]

heh,

you don't drink and get pulled over for being drunk.

I had a couple beers, and didn't.

Funny how the world works.



(Do note that I never drive if I'm not 100% sure I can, and I did just fine, 2 coronas in about two hours for a guy my size isn't shit)

[evl0ne]

(Do note that I never drive if I'm not 100% sure I can, and I did just fine, 2 coronas in about two hours for a guy my size isn't shit)

[Orin]

I got pulled over once and breathalized but as I reminded the cop, you have to have been drinking for that to register. It turns out that one of my rear lights was out.

I don't like what happened--it's a crock and sounds as though they were looking for something to do early on a Saturday morning. They will have checked your license number before pulling you over and were probably frustrated for having nothing show up. I know you can't be a smart ass with them or they would have kept it up until you took a swing at them or something. What assholes--I wonder how much real stuff they missed by harassing you?

[BunnyMan]

(Do note that I never drive if I'm not 100% sure I can, and I did just fine, 2 coronas in about two hours for a guy my size isn't shit)

You said that you wouldn't show anyone!

And yeah, cops are dicks. Alot of them will pull over just about anyone driving between 2:30 and 3:00 because that's when the bars get out. There's a high chance the person has been drinking, and they can bag another drunk.

[Maximal]

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

Take a swig of my drink and place it back in the cup holder.

I hope that was an extra large drink otherwise you drink like a girl

[Irondog]

I'd have to again say that I would guess that you needed to adjust the wheel because it got in the way of you enjoying yourself on the road. There seems to be a pattern here.

[Irondog]

After the 5th time of telling the dumb shit that you don't drink you should of told him to clean the fucking dirt out of his ears so he could hear what you said

[The Chump]

I got pulled over one .. accused of drinking and driving. I DID have a couple of beers that night .. and they could smell it on my breath.

So .. they made me do the breathalizer .. I PASSED.

Then .. they called for backup .. another car that had an 'alcholizer' (supposedly more accurate or something). I PASSED.

Didn't matter to those fuckers .. they told me they could smell the alcohol on my breath and were going to tow my car .. and they did. I had to cab it home .. and pay for the towing the next day when I picked up my car.

I tried to fight it to no avail .. I guess they have the 'right' to judge you beyond the breathalizer .. and the alcholizer.

I wasn't drunk at all .. and under my legal limit. Fuckers have nothing better to do.