I hope no one ever has to go through this

[Makya]

Seems like I keep disappearing all the damn time. I finally come back and then with a snap of your fingers I am gone again, right? Yeah, well you can blame that on life. I've had my hands full since August of last year. We had moved into our first house. Oh boy was I proud of that. Little did I know that house was a gateway for hell itself.

It all started so normally when we enrolled Jerison in Pre-k and that is when all the bad shit came to head. Dawg, while I feel that your child getting hurt that badly is a nightmare in itself, it does not hold a candle to what I am about to tell you all. Three days into my oldest starting school, I get a call from the teacher to inform me that Jerison was being suspended for a day for stabbing another child in the arm with a pencil. My heart stopped. We've known that Jerison had issues since his father and I seperated and divorced back in 06 and no one would ever listen to us. They just kept saying that it was our parenting skills and to try this or try that and blah blah blah. Fucking assholes. It wasn't until he stabbed that other child that people were now saying my child had issues. Well no shit Sherlock! And so our psychologist diagnosed him with ADHD and after the stabbing said there was nothing she could do for us and told us to seek psychiatriac (sp) help and so we did. The psychaitrist put him on an adhd medicine and a mood stabilizer to help with the violence and the sexual tendencies that Jerison exhibited because they actually listened. But it was to no avail. The mood stabilizer knocked out the violence and the sexual tendencies, but each medicine we tried would give Jerison a violent reaction. And in one instance he was seeing shit and hearing shit and it was scary. But then we found a medicine that seemed to help and for a time all was calm.

But then the mood stabilizer started dropping out of theraputic range (Which was in the 50s for his weight and size) and there came a day when I got a call from the teacher again informing me that Jerison stabbed another child. But this time in the eye with the eraser side of a pencil. After contacting the psychiatrist, she said that I needed to commit Jerison in a hospital. It was the hardest thing I ever did to put my little boy in a mental hospital for a week And they did shit for him. They upped his meds so he slept all day. I would go visit him every day and he would smell like urine, still in the same clothes I brought him there in. I was livid. Within a week of his discharge, I ended up getting another call from the teacher because Jerison was choking himself in class, choked the teachers assistant, licked her, stuck his hands down another kids pants, kissed that same little boy, and kicked the teacher herself. So once again I called the psychiatrist and was told to recommit my son. But this time I sought out the help from a different hospital, one that was a better place than the first and when I took him there, I told them everything, down to all the sexual things he has ever done because by now he was diagnosed as manic bi-polar and for some children there is increased sexual activity as a symptom, which was the case with Jerison. Before even checking his blood work to see if the meds were within theraputic range, they called CPS on me for sexually molesting Jerison. I was so appalled because the very next day his blood work came back and his depokene level, which was the mood stabilizer, had dropped from 52 to 15 within a month. Which explains why he was doing what he was in the first place.

Until the investigation is over, which the cps worker openly admitted to me, that he has found nothing wrong with me and I was only doing what was in the best interest for my child, they have taken away my kids. Luckily I was able to send Jerison and Rhone to their father and Torin is staying with Johnnys mother. So at least I know my children are safe. But the day Jeremy came to pick up Rhone, because I had already sent Jerison there, I snapped. I was already on the verge of snapping, I was constantly picking fights with Johnny and then I did the unthinkable. I filed a police report on him. Which afterwards, I went back and let them know that it was all a lie and I thought something was wrong with me and I was going to be checking myself into a place called Green Oaks, which is a mental hospital.

The day Jeremy came to pick up Rhone, officers came out to my house to get a statement from me about an accident, which is what I filed the report on, Jerison had on the 5th of June in which he had fallen and fractured his collar bone. As I watched Jeremy drive off with Rhone it all became too much to bear and the weight of loosing my children came down on me and I snapped right there in my front yard and had fallen to the ground rocking back and forth in absolute tears. The officers weren't comfortable with me waiting for my cousin to come and get me to take me to the hospital, they thought I was suicidal, and took me themselves.

I had a nervous breakdown and was told I was suffering from severe depression and put on Zoloft. I'm not sure if I will ever be ok again. I can get the baby back if I attend counseling and all that shit, but I can't get Jerison and Rhone back. And all this came about because I was trying to get help for my son because since he was two I knew there was a problem. I truly hope that no one here ever has to go through this. I would not wish this on my worst enemy.

[Maximal]

wow, that sucks so much

Sorry to hear all that...........wow

[Makya]

Thanks Max.

[mommysalomi]

WTF that is absolulty horriffic. I am so sorry this happened to you. I just cannot [as a mother who does anything they can to help thier children] wrap my head around this.. Hopefully somehow someway things while get better for you

[Makya]

Well after it's all over, I plan on suing the fuck out of the hospital.

[WillRiker]

Wow.

[Purple Dragon]

big wow.I'm in tears for you..that is so awful.i wish i could give you a big hug.all that because you wanted to get help for your child..you be strong and it will all work out i hope..keep me informed,i know we miles apart,but if you need a friendly ear just pm,and rant away..love mam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Lady Dee]

Holy F*ck, First off I can't believe that the first place you took your son too; did nothing! I mean in terms of care, to smell like urine be in the same clothes even after a few days, is neglect! I hope this 2nd place is much better!

Second, I hope things slowly start looking up for you! I'm sorry for your struggles, Best wishes to you and your children!

[Iamthesevendeadly_sins]

Holy Christ. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I cannot believe how dismissive doctors are, especially with children. Stay strong for your children, they know how much you love them, things will turn around I know it. Love ya.