MTW BOOK- Favorite Joke

[Maximal]

http://www.mortystwistedworld.com/fo...1-stutter.html

[qwazywabbet]

Another stuttin joke................


John and Ed walked into a bar.
Ed: "What do you want to drink, Jackass?"
John: "A..A...A pa...pa..pi..pint o..of gi...gi..gi Guinness A..apint of Guinness, please."
Ed goes up to the bar. "Two pints of Guinness for me and my mate the Jackass."
Ed takes the drinks back. "Here you go, Jackass."
Later when they had finished their drinks, Ed says to John, "It's your round,Jackass. Go get us a pint o' Guinness."
John goes to the bar. "T..T...T..two pa..pa...pa..pi..pints o..o..of gi..gin..gi..Guinness. Two pints of Guinness, please."
When the barman was sure Ed wasn't listening he said, "I think it's awful him calling you Jackass all the time."
John says, Oh, "he..aw" "he..aw" "he..aw" "he always calls me that."

[Maximal]

http://www.mortystwistedworld.com/fo...icult-say.html


THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Kebab? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke..
7. I'm not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

[Purple Dragon]

married couple in their sixtys are visited by a fairy
who grants them both a wish.
I want 2 travel around the world with my husband
said the wife....2 tickets for a luxury cruise magically
appear in her hand...
husband says sorry love but my wish is to have a wife
30 years younger than me...
so the fairy waves her wand and the husband becomes 92...
moral of the story,men who are ungrateful bastards
should remember-fairies are fuckin FEMALE..........

[BunnyMan]

Originally Posted by Maximal

http://www.mortystwistedworld.com/fo...icult-say.html


THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Kebab? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke..
7. I'm not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

I got to find a couple of jokes I wanted to put in, but just wanted to say for the moment I completely vote for this one. Funny thing is that you actually know I'm drunk because I start using words like preliminary (correctly too!) when drunk. But I can never say Specificity.
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0h, and is this book still happening cause it's like july...

[WillRiker]

I think it could still be pulled together...just depends on how much time Morty has I guess.

If he needs someone to do all the work as in pull it together, I'm more than willing.

[Morty]

I'm actually planning on attempting to begin pulling it all together in about 2 weeks. I'm gone this weekend, figure next weekend I'll upgrade MTW's script. So hopefully the following. Shouldn't be too terribly difficult. But we'll see I guess.

[mommysalomi]

IDK just throwing it out there. But if Will is willing to put the actual book together I think he would do a mighty fine job..