Britney Spears Found Naked and Passed Out On Curb

[Morty]

Well, as many of you know, I got married a couple months ago. One of our wedding gifts was a juicer. We've been meaning to break it out and use it but never got around to it.

I'm not a fan of vegetables and fruits. I'm more of a Beef, Chicken, Rice and a Dr. Pepper kind of guy. I aim to eat "healthier" meals a good part of the time, but still lack in my veges and fruits.

My wife is always bugging me to eat more veges and fruits and she knows I just don't like eating that stuff. Its very difficult for me to finish a single raw, uncooked carrot. Just so bland tasting. But I tell her my tolerance of drinking nasty tasting drinks is much better and I'll drink anything she makes me. Just so long as it doesn't have Avocado or Sour Cream in it, I can drink it. Regardless of how much I dislike it.

So we broke out the juicer Saturday night and my wife made a drink that had a few apples, some carrots, celery and I think that's all it had. Quick and simple. No excuse not to drink healthy like this more often. Just pure vege juice. No water or anything added to it.

Well, come Sunday morning. I woke up and took a single turd release and the pickle was close to 12" long at least. Single solid, healthy looking, no mud but or anything. Cleaned up easy. My favorite kind of shit. The clean starfish kind.

Around 10am, I had to go again, this one was probably just as long as the first.

Then again around 2pm, this one being just a little shorter. Again, solid, single piece, and no skids on the way out. Easy clean up.

Guess what happened again around 5pm? Yep! This one being around 8 or 9". So that was the last one for the day.

After dinner, we made another vege drink. This one with carrots, celery and tomatoes. Curious how today is going to go. I hate pooping at work.

So, onto things less life altering...................

My internet connection was in and out most of the weekend due to the rain I guess. My phones have been dead for about 2 weeks, so phone company came out Friday evening. Right when the guy knocked on my door to let me know he was going to go in the backyard and check out the system, I quickly checked the phone again. Go figure. I had a dial-tone again. And he hadn't even started messing with anything yet. Came back some time during the day when the rain started.

He messed around with things and all was good. Then come saturday and sunday, dial-tone was still there, but the internet kept dropping out every 5 minutes or so. Got frustrating so I gave up on it. Argh.

Internet held strong for about an hour on Sunday so I added about another hundred games or so to the arcade. Haven't gotten a chance to properly organize them yet, but they are all sitting in the Premium Membership category and I'll be spreading them out to the other non-premium categories when I get a chance this week.

Other than that, I don't have much to say. Besides our weather reporters are clueless. "Stormwatch 2008" was all they were talking about last week. Suppose to have this major rain all weekend. From last Thursday and into today. Never rained Thursday, started mid-day Friday. Saturday was figured to have an inch of rain every hour for about 6 hours they figured mid-day. It sprinkled in the morning, and I didn't see any more sprinkling until around 5PM. Rained some at night, nothing hard. Sprinkled all day yesterday and the skies are clear of clouds today.

WTF????? These people get paid to be completely fucking inaccurate? What a joke. I should have been a weatherman.

Anyway...........

Ain't that a snazzy title to this POS ramble. Has nothing to do with my ramble, but I'm sure a few of you read this thing just out of pure curiosity.

Have a great day!

[Irondog]

You cocksucker..............I was hoping to see new pictures of her cootchie and all I got was great details about your "UNHEALTHY" shits.

I don't think in my entire life have I ever shit more than twice in one day.........you better go see a fucking Dr............FAST!!!!!!!!!!!

[Morty]

I shit once a day like clockwork. I'd of been nervous if it was mudbutt, but these all looked normal. I think the dose of fiber or something just cleaned out all the remnants that have been growing in my tubes or something. I dunno. Maybe it was just a coincedence it was a day after my vege drink.

[WillRiker]

I changed the heading to spell Britney the right way..might help snag a few more suckers...

[CableMonkey]

Originally Posted by Morty

no mud but or anything.

But what?


----------

Originally Posted by WillRiker

I changed the heading to spell Britney the right way..might help snag a few more suckers...

You could also try spelling Naked correctly.

[WillRiker]

I only just spotted that one....

[Maximal]

Originally Posted by WillRiker

I changed the heading to spell Britney the right way..might help snag a few more suckers...

hmmmm and it brought Cablemonkey right on in.

Nice job Will

[CableMonkey]

Originally Posted by Maximal

hmmmm and it brought Cablemonkey right on in.

I read MTW for the articles, and the spelling errors.

[Morty]

The power of an RSS feed.
----------
2:45PM. No pickles, but lots of gas.

[Maximal]

thanks for the update I was starting to wonder