5 KINDS OF MARITAL SEX

**WillRiker** · 11-07-2003, 05:37 PM

1) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honey- moon, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.

2) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen.

3) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.

4) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Fuck you!"

5) The fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom

**Morty** · 11-07-2003, 07:04 PM

I'm hoping I some how manage to not have the Courtroom Sex.

**WillRiker** · 11-07-2003, 08:17 PM

I was gonna say that I'd hate to think of you having Courtroom Sex, but then again, I'd hate to think about you having any kind of sex....nothing personal you understand but after the picture of your butt-cracks that Cable Monkey posted, I just don't think I could cope with that particular mental image!!!

**Morty** · 11-07-2003, 11:09 PM

Funny guy. Just for that, I might have to put a pic of me masturbating or something.

CableMonkey · 11-08-2003, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morty

I might have to put a pic of me masturbating

We have all suffered enough. Keep Mr. Winkie in the pants.

**mommysalomi** · 10-05-2006, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Funny guy. Just for that, I might have to put a pic of me masturbating or something

Okay Morty almost three years later but I'd love to see this................

lilmamma · 10-05-2006, 02:18 PM

i have to agree

11-07-2003, 05:37 PM	#1 (permalink)
WillRiker Lusting Over Leelee Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 12,783	5 KINDS OF MARITAL SEX 1) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honey- moon, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face. 2) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen. 3) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom. 4) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Fuck you!" 5) The fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom __________________ MTW Merchandise - Get Your MTW Stuff From Morty NOW!!

11-07-2003, 07:04 PM	#2 (permalink)
Morty Your Twisted Leader Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 7,616	I hope I'm hoping I some how manage to not have the Courtroom Sex.

11-07-2003, 08:17 PM	#3 (permalink)
WillRiker Lusting Over Leelee Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 12,783	I was gonna say that I'd hate to think of you having Courtroom Sex, but then again, I'd hate to think about you having *any* kind of sex....nothing personal you understand but after the picture of your butt-cracks that Cable Monkey posted, I just don't think I could cope with that particular mental image!!! __________________ MTW Merchandise - Get Your MTW Stuff From Morty NOW!!

11-07-2003, 11:09 PM	#4 (permalink)
Morty Your Twisted Leader Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 7,616	Haaha Funny guy. Just for that, I might have to put a pic of me masturbating or something.

10-05-2006, 02:18 PM	#7 (permalink)
lilmamma Elder Monkey Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 3,090	Re: 5 KINDS OF MARITAL SEX i have to agree __________________ One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob: "If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts."

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