Life Explained

[Diva]

On the first day G-d created the cow. G-d said, "You must go to the field all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of 60 years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life if you want me to live for 60 years. Let me have 20 years and I'll give back the other 40." And G-d agreed.

On the second day, G-d created the dog. G-d said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of 20 years."

The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me 10 years, and I'll give back the other 10." So G-d agreed (sigh).

On the third day G-d created the monkey. G-d said, entertain people, do monkey tricks and make them laugh. I'll give you a 20 year life span."

The Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for 20 years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back 10, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And G-d agreed again.

On the fourth day G-d created man. G-d said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you 20 years."

Man said, "What? Only 20 years? No way. Tell you what, I'll take my 20, the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the dog gave back and the 10 the monkey gave back. That makes 80, okay?"

"Okay," said G-d. "You've got a deal."

So that is why for the first 20 years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy and do nothing; for the next 40 years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next 10 years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grand-children and for the last 10 years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.

Life has now been explained.