How to get banned from Wal-Mart.

[WillRiker]

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired. Mrs. Fenton insists that he go with her to Wal-Mart. He gets bored with all the shopping. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here's a letter sent to her from the store.

Dear Mrs. Fenton:

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.

Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.. and watched what happened.

5. Aug 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. Sept 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Sept 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. Sept 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry >and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Oct 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

10. Nov 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where to find the antidepressants.

11. Dec 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. Dec 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Dec 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. Dec 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

And last, but not least .
15. Dec 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!!

[smilin heinz]

Oh, I loved those!!! Great Idea!! Time to have some fun!!

[mommysalomi]

10. Nov 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where to find the antidepressants

This one kinda happened when I was a teen workin at K-mart. Two guys were lookin at the riffles and wanted to know where the Kava-kava[natural anti-depressant] was and if it was high powered enough to go through a front door and still hit thier target !!!!! I was stressin out til they started laughing thier asses off !!!

[Im Special]

Ha those are awesome I think I am gonna try the condom one and the Mission Impossible one

[Layni]

When I worked at walmart we would get bored that we would put different things in people's carts... condoms, preparation H...all sort of things. It was hilarious to see them go into checkout and try to figure out how it got in there.

[Purple Dragon]

oh i'm so gonna try that, be great fun.......

[TATTOOED_1_ONE]

I do the condom one all the time, but one that is more fun is to put womens panties in a guys cart!

[Bones]

14. Dec 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!

This is why my mother won't go shopping with me.