X-rated riddles

**Maximal** · 10-26-2006, 09:36 AM

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it!

Q. What is a Yankee?
A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?
A. About three inches.

Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A . They don't have balls to scratch!

**mommysalomi** · 10-26-2006, 10:23 AM

Quote:

Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

This one made me wanna puke....Thats not right

**Danimal** · 10-26-2006, 05:36 PM

lilmamma · 10-26-2006, 06:50 PM

hey mommy what do you call hemroids on a fag??...... speedbumps

or what do you call balls on a fag.... mud flaps (oldie but a goodie)

**mommysalomi** · 10-26-2006, 07:08 PM

EEEWWW, unwanted visuals here.........

Lady Dee · 10-27-2006, 02:08 PM

oh man lil, those two were awsome also! I love 'em, I would totally put them on my wall!

SmileyBoo · 10-29-2006, 11:17 AM

prodmanca · 10-30-2006, 03:24 PM

Q:what did one gay man say to the other at the bar
A: can i push your stool in for you?

Lady Dee · 10-30-2006, 05:40 PM

eeeeewwww! That's nasty!

**mommysalomi** · 10-30-2006, 06:17 PM

10-26-2006, 09:36 AM	#1 (permalink)
Maximal I'm Surrounded by Retards Premium Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 11,980	X-rated riddles Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. Q. What's a mixed feeling? A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. Q. What's the height of conceit? A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name. Q. What's the definition of macho? A. Jogging home from your vasectomy. Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex? A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick! Q.Why is divorce so expensive? A. Because it's worth it! Q. What is a Yankee? A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone. Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common? A. They both like a tight seal. Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common? A. Their balls are just for decoration. Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"? A. About three inches. Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms? A. For traction in the mud. Q: What's the difference between purple and pink? A. The grip. Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony? A. It's not hard. Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly? A: Kick his sister in the jaw. Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 pounds. Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 minutes. Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? A: Breasts don't have eyes. Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love? A. The swallow. Q: What is the difference between medium and rare? A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare. Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning? A . They don't have balls to scratch! __________________ Mortys Twisted Treasure Hunt

10-26-2006, 05:36 PM	#3 (permalink)
Danimal MTW Baseball Geek Premium Member Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 745	Re: X-rated riddles

10-26-2006, 06:50 PM	#4 (permalink)
lilmamma Elder Monkey Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 3,090	Re: X-rated riddles hey mommy what do you call hemroids on a fag??...... speedbumps or what do you call balls on a fag.... mud flaps (oldie but a goodie) __________________ One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob: "If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts."

10-26-2006, 07:08 PM	#5 (permalink)
mommysalomi cannot get away Premium Member Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 5,340	Re: X-rated riddles EEEWWW, unwanted visuals here......... __________________ Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult

10-27-2006, 02:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
Lady Dee MTW's Canadian Playmate Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,046	Re: X-rated riddles oh man lil, those two were awsome also! I love 'em, I would totally put them on my wall! __________________ "You are Action Packed with Issues..."

10-29-2006, 11:17 AM	#7 (permalink)
SmileyBoo MTW Addict Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 247	Re: X-rated riddles __________________ Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?

10-30-2006, 03:24 PM	#8 (permalink)
prodmanca Newbie Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18	Re: X-rated riddles Q:what did one gay man say to the other at the bar A: can i push your stool in for you?

10-30-2006, 05:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
Lady Dee MTW's Canadian Playmate Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,046	Re: X-rated riddles eeeeewwww! That's nasty! __________________ "You are Action Packed with Issues..."

10-30-2006, 06:17 PM	#10 (permalink)
mommysalomi cannot get away Premium Member Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 5,340	Re: X-rated riddles __________________ Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult

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