[Boozer]

Defense Attorney:
What is your age?

Little old Woman:
I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you?

Little old Woman:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm
spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat
down beside me.

Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?

Little old Woman:
No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?

Little old Woman:
He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?

Little old Woman:
No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little old Woman:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner passed away some 30
years ago.

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little old Woman:
He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?

Little old Woman:
No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little old Woman:
Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I
haven't felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little old Woman:
Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and said to
him..."Take me ...young man...Take me!"

Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?

Little old Woman:
Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!" ...And that's when I shot the
little bastard.