[Maximal]

Calories Burned During Sex:

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent.....................................12 Calories
Without her consent............................2,187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................. 8 Calories
With one hand...................................12 Calories
With your teeth .................................485 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection......................................6 Calories
Without an erection...........................3,315 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary........................................ ....12 Calories
69 lying down......................................78 Calories
69 standing up...................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow.....................................21 6 Calories
Doggy Style......................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier..........................2,912 Calories

ORGASMS:
Real.............................................1 12 Calories
Fake..........................................1,31 5 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.............................18 Calories
Getting up immediately..........................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately...816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years.......................................36 Calories
30-39 years.......................................80 Calories
40-49 years......................................124 Calories
50-59 years...................................1,972 Calories
60-69 years...................................7,916 Calories
70 and over........................Results are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS
Calmly..........................................32 Calories
In a hurry.......................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..........5,218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories

These results may vary.