[smilin heinz]

I am not an expert but maybe you should all think about counseling together. Alot of times in mixed families no matter how hard you try to prove you love the child from the previous marriage all they see is new family and happiness. When what they're used to is the old family and misery, so they are part of the old. I can tell you really do care what happens to this kid and if it is affecting your marriage then even suggesting couseling could help. It would show your wife just how much this all means to you and everything. You seem to be making all the right moves though, don't waver on that.