[Bones]

I attribute the death of Jesus to being nailed to a cross and hung up to die. But in reality a homosexual hugged him to death. He was then resurrected in Canada. Where he became a French speaking socialist. And opened a school for handicapped puppies. He lived there for many years till he drank a Canadian beer and promptly died. But that wasn't dramatic enough to be printed in the bible. Hence the myth of crucifixion.